Annie B Garman

December 2010 Haley: Age 6 Setting:  The kids are sitting on the couch in the basement watching ME do a Jillian Michaels work-out video. (First thing that's UNFAIR). Haley:  Mom!!  Why do you have a BEARD under your arm pit? Me:  Oh, come ON, Haley... That's not fair.  It's not THAT BAD. Haley:  Yes it is.  THAT. IS. DISGUSTING. Me:  You just wait till YOU have three kids and it's winter time... Read More

Darcy:  Age 4 Setting:  Darcy comes up to me with a pencil and a note-pad.   Darcy:  Mommy, what do you want to order from my resta-want? Me:  Hmmm....well, Pesto Chicken sounds wonderful. Darcy:  Well, ax-ually we don't has pesto chicken. Me:  Okay.  Well, I'll just have some water with ice cubes. Darcy:  Well, ax-ually, we don't has any ice cubes. Me:  Alright....So, what DO you have at your restaurant, Darcy? Darcy:  Breast milk. Read More

Haley:  Age 5 Life is hard with three kids under five.  Especially that first week you bring your baby home from the hospital.  Before tucking my two oldest kids into bed one night, I emphasized how the next morning they were NOT to wake me up early.  I was going to be up three times during the night to feed the baby, so if they could just PLEASE let me rest and get their own cereal, I would be grateful.  We went through what I expected from them and I went to bed that night hopeful for a few Read More

Darcy:  Age 4 Having a baby, of course, is a rocking concept for most children to grasp.  We managed to do a pretty good job keeping things simple and concrete for our kids for the first nine months.   In my last week of pregnancy, we went to the doctor's office for a check up.  As the doctor checked to see how far dialated I was, the kids were on the other side of the curtain with their Daddy getting a little lesson on child-birth. Unfortunately, Colby must have been a little too thorough in Read More

Haley:  Age 5 Haley had been taking swimming lessons during the summer and could swim the length of the pool under one condition:  She HAD TO have her goggles on.  Recently we took the kids berry-picking at a local farm and on our way to the bushes overheard this conversation: Dad:  Watch out for that puddle, Haley! Haley:  I'm staying RIGHT HERE.  I'm NOT moving. Dad:  Why? Haley:  I'm afraid I'm going to fall into one of the puddles and it's going to be OVER MY HEAD...and I DO NOT have MY Read More

Setting:  We had just waited for 14 months to get a residence permit to live in Iceland.  When we finally did get them, we had to go to the Embassy in London. (Darcy and Haley playing with their dolls in the living room) Darcy:  Haley!  Quick!  We have to go to the doctors!  My baby is coming out! (Dramatic groans and wails as Darcy pretends to be in labor). Darcy:  Its....it's...IT'S A GIRL!!  And, look....it's a MERMAID! Haley:  Wow, Darc, that's great!  Now we have to go to the Read More

Darcy :  Age 3 (Explaining to the kids the significance of the Good Friday) Me:  So, you see...Good Friday is the day that we REMEMBER Jesus' death. Darcy (wide, scared eyes):  But..." (choking up) "I DON'T RE-MEMBER!!! ******************************************************************* (Scooting over to let me sit by her) Darcy:  Mom, you can sit by me.  I saved you a lot of room. Me:  Thanks, baby. Darc:  Mom, do you know WHY I gave you more room than me? Me:  No, honey, why? Darcy: Read More

Darcy:  Age 3 Darcy was busy the other day taking care of her baby dolls, rocking them, feeding them, and taking them for "walks" around the apartment.  I overheard her explaining to Haley quite adamantly, "I didn't HAS NO MIS-CARRWIGE.  My babies CAMED OUT." *********************************************************************** Darcy (on a walk, seeing a cigarette on the ground):  Mom, can I have a smoke? **************************************************************************** Darcy: Read More

Haley Jane:  Age 4 (Context:   I had just had a miscarriage DURING A CAMPING TRIP where my husband also had gotten sick, and soon we were going to have to leave Iceland again because the VISA still hadn't been granted). Haley was on the computer skyping with her Grammy and Papa last weekend, describing to them her first camping trip.  The conversation went like this: Pappy:  Haley, what did you think of camping? Haley:  Well, the first night we got there it was good.....that's because no one Read More