Last weekend, my husband and I had the opportunity to talk to a room of church planters and their wives. I was able to read the following letter to the men in the room who were starting a church from scratch. If some of this resonates with any of you wives out there, I pray you would find the right time and place to communicate with your husband in a spirit of graciousness. Dear Church Planter, If you’d be willing to listen, please allow me to share with you Four Things Your Wife Wants You to Read More
Good Friday and My Really Bad One
A few months ago on a Friday, there were some words exchanged in our home that led me to lock myself in the bathroom and get on my knees (Deep breath for those of you who thought being a pastor/pastor's wife meant being immune from these kinds of things...). The details are muddy, but I'm sure it involved being challenged by my husband, my pride getting dealt a good blow, and feeling offended. I was nursing the wound with tender, loving care when I remembered my prayer from that morning, Read More
The Imperfect Pastor
Today I called my friend who just happens to be a pastor’s wife. “How are ya?” I ask casually. “Not good,” she says, not trying to pretend in the least. My ears perk up and I can feel myself getting excited by her rawness. “Okay, so what’s going on?” I dig a little until I run into some roots. “We’re just having trouble this week… I don’t feel very loved by him…” After several minutes of conversation, we come to the source of their primary struggle: she was frustrated that her husband Read More
The Night I Asked For Prayer instead of Chocolate
Recently I called two friends and asked if we could get together for prayer and accountability. I knew it wasn’t going to be much fun. I mean, I would have much rather asked them to go to Applebees for a Triple Chocolate Meltdown, but I knew I needed this. I needed to reach out and admit that I wasn’t doing okay and that I needed prayer. It was the last thing on earth that I wanted to do--be vulnerable and share my sin struggles. It’s a lot easier to put on like I’m strong and have Read More
I am a Pastor’s Wife
When asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, there were a lot of things on my list. There was one thing, however, that I did NOT want to be and that was…(you guessed it)…a pastor’s wife. I’m not sure how it happened exactly... which (I know what you’re thinking) is completely naïve and foolish, but one minute I was a junior in college dating a tall, handsome Biblical Studies major... ...and then the next minute we were engaged, and he was looking at a job as a Bible teacher at a Christian Read More
Today is Our Anniversary
I never wanted to get married, at least that’s what I claimed. I met Colby John Garman my freshman year of college right outside the post office on campus. He was wearing a plastic bow tie (obviously attained from the nearby dollar theatre) and shook my hand jokingly like a politician. I can remember the morning sun was in my eyes as I looked at him and could really only make out a fuzzy silhouette. I didn’t think twice about him. I was meeting new people every single day. As the year Read More
Do you ever…
Do you ever lay on the ground and look up at the pale, white moon in the afternoon sky and think about how you are sitting on a speck of cosmic dust suspended in space at the mercy of its Creator? Just wondering... Do you ever sit on the driveway with your four-year old after breakfast and talk about the miracle of skin cell reproduction? Do you ever hide your to-do list for a day so you can spend more time looking at your husband in the eyes and being there to listen when he decides to Read More
A Happy Ninth Anniversary
Thoughts from my husband: Nine years ago today, Annie and I were married at Faith Baptist Church in LaCrosse, WI. Ten years ago today we began dating after I tried to convince her of it for nearly a year. So, how do you celebrate an anniversary when you have a three week old and your living in a temporary house in a town that you had never been to until a month ago? You go back to the place it all began and tell your kids stories about their mom and dad falling in love. For us, it all began Read More
The True Adventure
On September 1st, 2000, Colby asked me if there was any chance we would ever be more than friends. I told him absolutely not. I was happy to be neighbors for the rest of my life, but getting into a serious relationship was out of the question. I wasn't ready to start dating him because I feared that would lead to marriage, and marriage... would lead to boring lives that consisted of work and PBS television every evening. I told Colby early that late summer evening that getting into a Read More
Ever After..
My husband wrote this on our anniversary: Today is our 8th Wedding Anniversary. It's always hard to believe we are getting older, but we are edging ever closer to ten years of marriage and that is unfathomable. These are the moments we say, "time flies" or "before you know it," hoping to capture in words our sense of the fleeting nature of life. I must say...I like marriage. Not so much because either of us are very good at it, but precisely because we are not. There is nothing more rigorous Read More